Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Passion or Poison?

"Had a hard day! What shall I choose?"
These days, everyone is doing something or another for a 'quick fix'. With all of the chaoses of a modern society, when you finally get to relax and/or have a drink (or 2, or 3), you seem to have a sense of entitlement. Somehow, you feel as though you've "earned" it because of how hard your day was.  At least that's how I feel, dammit! After a long day of working, doing millions of household chores, chasing and yelling behind the kids AND trying to workout, I see absolutely nothing wrong with chillin' and "sippin' a Sands" when that break finally comes. My personal fav, an ice cold Heiney, would be even better. Then... of course if you're REALLY stressed out, a lemon Mojito or glass of Bailey's would be quite fitting. (Spiked please)!

Then comes the smokers. I've been smoking off and on since I was about 12 or 13, thanks to a Jamaican housekeeper we had at the time, named Marva. Marva would sit on the back patio every chance she got, chewing ice and smoking ciggies. "Ya' wah' wan?", she asked. Of course you know the answer to that! I started with "wan", and a serious habit followed. I can even remember one of my uncles spanking me at 12 because he came home and smelled smoke on my breath.  Oh well! You live, you learn. Next time I'll do it OUTSIDE and brush my teeth afterward. (Tee hee). I wasn't guilty mainly because of the fact that they smoked as well and kept their Kool's in their Sunday suit jackets! When you puff your first one, you feel your troubles literally lifting "up in smoke". That is until you've bought pack # 76 and you start to get annoyed at never having a lighter, God's fresh breeze for blowing out your lighter, the white ash that's all over your clothes and the fact that you smell like a DC trucker.
Bob Marley

When it comes to weed, I think just about everyone has either smoked it at least once in their life, has it occasionally like when out with friends once every few months or so, Or can't stop doing it and has to have it whenever it crosses their mind. It relaxes you for damned sure and takes your mind into the "Happy-Hippy" mode. I can't see a person really doing anything violent or inhumane if they are under the effects of THC alone. Perhaps other 'uppers', but not weed. For me however, it's not as "dope" as others claim and just is a great sleep aid. I would never want anyone to see me in that altered state and I get super paranoid. Not to mention, it turns you into a "Munchie Machine"! Some say that smoking marijuana makes you look wasted because you don't really want to eat, you'd rather smoke. But for me, the "food" my mind is on is either in the fridge or cupboards!  You crave sweets so bad that you'd eat Milo right out of the tin! If you're serious about your eating habits and fitness level, weed is not the way to go. Try a Redbull instead!

Coffee has also been my addiction since I started working out of high school in a quiet office setting. I don't go overboard with it though and limit myself to no more than 2-3 cups per day. Any more than that, I'm a nervous wreck with a fluttering heart and engorged fists. Caffeine in the form of a Diet Coke or energy drink will do if cafe's not available. In moderation, it wakes you up, makes you more alert and amps your concentration skills. Too much and you're a mess.

One thing I wonder though, is whether or not these things are too readily available, boring the users into trying 'other' things.  I you're so unhappy that none of these are really doing it for you, then perhaps you should do some serious soul searching. Ask yourself "what is it in my life that's making me unhappy and what do I need to change?" How are you feeling spiritually about yourself? Sometimes we don't fall victims to habits because we're just stressed and want to unwind. Sometimes it goes deeper and we're actually trying to drown a chronic issue or shut ourself out of 'this world'. Sometimes it's to follow fashion and look wild and spontaneous to peers. We go out and say we're "loving ourselves", when in fact we're hating ourselves. Getting pissy drunk, doing the splits in a short white skirt on the bare floor while sweating like Elephant Man and getting laid in the bush for a ride home is NOT what I call LOVIN' YA'SELF!

Finding hobbies and positive things that really interest you is a great way to gain self control and broaden your horizons at the same time. Boredom is a bitch and can make you do some silly shit. Take it from me! Think about when you are most happy and what has you feeling that way. That's how you know what your passion is.

When I'm listening to music or expressing my thoughts in writing or through art, I'm happy all over. Music and literature are my drugs of choice. I especially love the electric guitar and would say I am at an intermediate level of play! Too bad my 2yr old princess just yanked out 4 of my strings! (Again!)
 "Vangogh's House at Arles" by Suerenity (N.G.M Major High - 1999)
"Love is Pain" by Suerenity
"WhateveR" by Suerenity ('04)

What's your poison?..I mean passion? One is completely different from the other, but are often confused.


  1. Great piece! I really enjoyed reading it, I will be sure to include it in my up-coming carnival, thanks for sharing :)


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